Okay, so we know it seems like it's been A WHILE since we've posted, and that's because it has...
There is a reason why we haven't posted, and it's partly because there hasn't been much new to post about, partly because of superstition, and partly because we've been dealing with a myriad of emotions ranging from excitement, to nervousness but ultimately ending in heartbroken happiness. The last time we posted we had just finished our home study, and until recently we had not moved any further with our agency, so there was nothing new to report on. More on that later.... Superstition. We had this weird feeling that if we were to share what was going on, things wouldn't work out. We had a weird feeling anyway that things were too good to be true. Wondering what we're talking about? Well...here's the bad news. We might as well start with that, so then we can end with the good news and on a happy note. We had a failed adoption. In early March, a sweet expectant mother reached out to us. She was 6 months pregnant and she was POSITIVE she did not want to be a mom. She found us through a mutual friend on social media, and she asked us if we would be interested in possibly getting to know her and maybe adopting her child. We were of course skeptical at first. There are a lot of scams out there, people asking for money with the promise of a baby and then come to find out that they were never pregnant to begin with. But, as we went on talking, we realized that this was not the case with this mother. She never asked us for a penny. We eventually decided to meet over Zoom, and we ended up talking with each other for over an hour. We all got along really well and we felt super connected. Still...we were cautious. Fast forward a few weeks, and she sent us a message letting us know that she wanted to move forward with the adoption. We got her in touch with our lawyer and a social worker. The biological father signed over his rights. In the expectant mother's home state, she was not allowed to sign over her rights until 48 hours after the baby was born, by law. So, we had to wait for that. A few more weeks went by, and we still had good communication. She would keep us updated about her doctor's appointments, we felt good. But then, things started to change. Communication became less and less frequent. Conversations were shorter. She didn't reach out to us anymore. We knew, but we didn't want to believe it. Maybe she was just busy. Maybe she was just having second thoughts and needed some time to think. Maybe... But, then we got the call from the social worker. She told us she didn't have great news. We already knew that though. The expectant mother had changed her mind. She had been to the doctor, and she saw her little baby on that 3D ultrasound and everything became too real. She knew she couldn't go through with it. We knew. We were heartbroken. We had spent months preparing our hearts to love a baby that we would never meet. It was such a crushing feeling. We felt sad, but never mad. We felt upset, but never bitter. It was weird because part of us was heartbroken, but another part of us felt guilty for mourning the loss of a child that was never ours to begin with. How could she change her mind so quickly? How could she go from 100% positive to undecided to "never mind." But then again, how could we expect her not to change her mind? It was a hard few weeks for us after that, and that is why you all haven't heard much. Ho But today, today we got some good news. That expectant mother had a beautiful baby boy. She sent us a picture, and he is healthy and perfect with the cutest little chubby cheeks you could imagine. And guess what? She is SO HAPPY to be his mommy. She loves him so much. So, as heartbroken as we were, and still are, we know that that little baby is right where he needs to be. And our baby is still out there. There's another little one who will need us more, and when that time comes, we will be here, with open hearts and a deeper understanding of the love that goes into adoption from both sides. Soo, now we can move onto the good news. The good news is, we have finally been able to move forward with our agency. We picked up the pieces of our broken hearts, put them back together and dove into the next steps toward working with our agency. We scheduled our final consultation with our adoption worker and we completed our online profile as well as our hard copy profile books. Our books will arrive tomorrow and our online profile will "go live" next week! How exciting!! All we will have to do then is just wait for another expectant mother to choose us to be the mommies to her baby. A baby who needs us more. A baby who is meant to be the next piece to our puzzle. So, that is exactly what we will do. We will wait. And we will wait with an even greater appreciation for the sacrifice that the expectant mother will be making when she chooses us as the family for her child. Again, we want to thank everyone for your continued love and support. We are extremely humbled by all of the fundraising that we have been able to do this time around, it has been more helpful than you could imagine, and it has allowed us to get as far as we have in our adoption journey. We hope to continue to share our story with you all as we grow our family! ONE MORE FINAL ANNOUNCEMENT: We greatly overestimated our ability to put together a 500 piece puzzle while working full time, Anna being in school, and having a toddler. So, thankfully Sarah's grandma has offered to help us put the puzzle together! We will be having a puzzle reveal soon, but in the meantime, we did pick a winner for the raffle of the puzzle pieces. Congratulations to Ann from HP4!! You are the winner of the $50 Visa gift card. Please, if anyone has any questions at all about the process, please feel free to comment with a question. We want to answer anything and everything!
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AuthorsHello! We are Sarah and Anna, and we are inviting you to come along on our journey to adoption! Archives |